2008-02-16 - 1:08 p.m.

Their hearts beat so fast. I pick the two of them up daily and hold them to my ear like furry telephones, listening to their snuffly breathing and internal organs in real-time.

And it makes me sad to think about the limited number of heartbeats an animal gets in a lifetime. It makes me think about death like I have been every day lately and I've come to the conclusion my heart should calm down to a 1 BPM slow dance song. It sounds like a radar saying "blip ... blip ... blip" until some anonymous thing shows up on the shoreline that makes it quicken "blip!blip!blip!blip!" in excitement and hopefulness and surprise.

There isn't a single person or thing or idea to trust right now.

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